1st of January 2014. The day Romanians and Bulgarians flooded the borders.Remember how everyone laughed when only one of them showed up at Luton? As the only new Romanian in the UK enjoyed a free coffee courtesy of taxpayers’ money (scroungers!), who was it who was sneaking into the country unnoticed? CROATS! Bet you didn’t even know they joined the EU.


Headphones in ears, thousands of Croats are integrating courtesy of Text HOME to 78070, a concept album circulating the dark corners of the internet and a secret set of assimilation instructions. Authored by the infamous Romanian crime wave itself (plus a black-market Serbian), Text HOME to 78070 is an invaluable manual for urgent immigration advice.


Now exclusively available to UK passport holders and other brave crusaders, Text HOME to 78070 should be on the to-listen list of anyone determined to protect themselves and their family from the border-binge. Go on, have a listen. For the immigrant in you. And the immigrant after you.


Text HOME to 78070 is part of If you're not paying..., a project consisting of four audio performances, each made to be listened to in a specific situation, for free distribution online, commissioned by Giving in to Gift. It’s available for free download - no fees, no email signups, no tracking.


Devised, written and performed by There There

Sound: Barry Han

Photos: Patrícia Venâncio Oliveira and Dana Olarescu